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| How To Protect Your Marriage & Family By by Roy Milam In our day-to-day lives packed with crowded schedules, carpooling kids, career concerns, and endless errands, the concept of evil may not seem relevant. Yet Jesus taught us to pray, "deliver us from evil." Yes, evil is real and we must not be naïve about the opposition we face. The devil is no imaginary character, but a very real and present enemy. The Bible refers to him as "your adversary, the devil" (1 Peter 5:8). The Apostle Paul was serious when he said, "Put on the whole armor of God so that you may be able to withstand the schemes of the devil" (Ephesians 6:11).
Our marriages are at ground zero of a very real spiritual war. Satan attacked the first marriage (Gen 3:1-5), and he is still attacking marriages today. His scheme is the same now as it was then: "divide and conquer." He wants to divide you, have you thinking unkind thoughts about your spouse, and isolate you from one another. He is a master of deceit who will tempt you to focus on what you are getting from your spouse instead of what you are giving to your spouse. He is an accuser who will try to get you locked into thinking how wrong and selfish your spouse is, and how pridefully right you are. He will tempt you to criticize and tear down your spouse rather than building your spouse up.
It is unwary couples, undiscerning husbands and wives who are most easily ensnared in the devil's traps. Every opportunity where his way is not blocked he will attempt to infiltrate your mind, your emotions, and hence your marriage by trying to lure you down such paths as anger, criticism, unforgiveness, strife, defensiveness, lust, condemnation, fear, doubt, unbelief and discouragement. He will tempt you with thoughts, desires and urges to think, act or speak in ways that are unkind, divisive or hurtful to your mate and your marriage.
Fortunately, we possess potent weapons against Satan and his schemes. The apostle Paul admonishes us in 2 Corinthians 10:4, "We fight with weapons that are different from those the world uses. Our weapons have power from God that can destroy the enemy's strong places." One of the most powerful spiritual weapons we possess is God's truth. To protect our marriages by wielding the weapon of God's truth requires that we prepare ourselves for battle by diligently reading, studying, and meditating on The Word of God so that we can apply it in our everyday lives and relationships. When a couple memorizes, proclaims, and applies the Word of God against specific attacks on their marriage, the enemy must flee the field of battle, wounded and defeated.
Another powerful spiritual weapon we possess is prayer. In Ephesians we are warned, "And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests." And in James 4:7, we are given this command and promise: "Resist the devil and he will flee from you." To resist the devil pray with your mate, and for your mate. In doing so you will tap into the power of God and receive strength to handle new challenges that arise. You will help each other steer clear of situations that could make either of you more vulnerable to the adversary's schemes.
A prayerless marriage is a powerless marriage. When we fail to pray, our defenses are down; our flesh becomes weak consequently giving the enemy easy access to our areas of vulnerability. A prayerful marriage is a powerful marriage. Prayer, and the knowledge of God's truth are powerful weapons in our arsenal. By taking time to pray daily with and for our mate, and spending time in God's word we can win the spiritual battles and fortify our marriage against the wiles of the enemy.
Maybe it's time for you to reinforce that personal commitment to protecting your marriage and family by spending time with the Lord in His word, and by praying with and for your spouse every day. Keep watching and praying, and you'll be fully armed and prepared to protect your marriage and family from any assault of the enemy. Why do marriages fail? While the answers to that question are many and often complex, there is a growing body of research suggesting that there are four negative risk factors- four negative behavior patterns that create barriers in a marriage and increase a couple's chances for marital failure. In one key studiy, researchers followed a sample of 135 couples for twelve years, starting before they were married, and were able to differentiate those couples who do well from those who do not, with up to 91% accuracy.* Crucial to the success of any marriage is for couples to eliminate or reduce the occurrence of these four risk factors. Previously we discussed Escalation* and Invalidation. Now, let's take a look at a third one - Negative Interpretations. "And God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them" (Genesis 1:27).
God did a wonderful thing when He created man and woman so differently. The differences between man as male and woman as female were intended to usher in many special blessings (Genesis 1:28). Unfortunately, because of the fall, the blessings of the sexes became the battle between the sexes. The unique qualities with which God endowed each, now give rise to misunderstanding and conflict rather than completion and harmony.
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