Launching Our Arrows
By Roy Milam
As I sit here at our computer writing this newsletter, I'm looking at a picture on my desk. It's a recent picture of our three youngest children, Joshua, Stephen and Laura. I find it fascinating how this scripture passage describes them. They are like arrows in my quiver. I was just pondering the implications of that passage- within the four walls of our home, each of them is being sharpened, positioned and readied for flight.
Arrows aren't intended to stay in a quiver. They're made to be launched. These children of ours are like arrows, they’re intended to fly. The home is where these little arrows are fashioned, straightened and prepared for flight but they're not intended to stay bunched up within the four walls of their childhood home. When the time comes, they are meant to be released. And God certainly wouldn't have us send them off aimlessly, without direction. No, He would have us aim them precisely at the target and hit the mark with maximum impact.
What is the target? The target is biblically and morally responsible adulthood, walking with God, living according to His purposes and making a strong impact in their world. That's the target. But whether or not an arrow hits the mark straight on, and hits it with maximum impact, any experienced archer will tell you, depends largely upon the eye and skill of the archer drawing the bow.
One experienced bow hunter says, "It's extremely important that your aim be consistent, that you think through the release. That the action be fluid- practiced, deliberate, consistent. If it's not all these things, you'll have an arrow that flies with a wobbly tail. What you want is an arrow that flies straight and true and balanced. What you want is an arrow that packs a wallop". Strength, concentration, aim and skill are critical to hitting the mark.
That's how it is in rearing our children isn’t it? If we want our arrows to hit the mark with a "wallop," we need to keep a steady aim on the mark and launch them with wisdom and skill. Life is too short to make random shots in the air. Time doesn't allow for a slipshod "I shot an arrow into the air; it fell to earth I know not where" kind of thinking.
And yet, as we work with families, we find a surprising number of parents who don't really know where they are aiming their children. Many parents seem to have the idea that everything will somehow just "come naturally" at raising a family. Somehow, they reason, the skills and wisdom that are needed will just be there. Nice thought, but parenting just doesn't normally happen that way. Wise parenting doesn't just come naturally. In fact, parenting by our natural instincts rather than by God's wisdom can be extremely perilous. This is true especially in the times and culture we live in today, where all kinds of forces threaten to undermine the future of our families.
It is vital that we think biblically and act deliberately regarding the rearing of our children. Those God-given arrows are indeed too precious to waste. So, dad and mom, how's your aim? Is your target well defined? Is it in clear sight? Do you have all the skills and knowledge you need to launch your arrows accurately?
Every parent hopes their children will be ready to face the world and be equipped to stand strong in life’s battles. There are no shortcuts to successful parenting . . . no secret formulas to raising kids of strength and character. However, there are steps we can take to prepare them for the challenges ahead.
If you’re interested in honing your archery skills in this area of parenting, may I recommend a book… one that’s helped us in our parenting, “Raising Kids Who Turn Out Right,” by Tim Kimmel. With warmth and conviction, Tim outlines a strategy for positive parenting--a plan that gives you reachable goals, while allowing for your personal parenting style. You can order it by phoning our office at (281) 304-1500 or order online in our product store.
1 Stu Weber, Tender Warrior (Sisters, Oregon: Multnomama Books, 1993), 158
